Redefining Failure and Freedom with Will Melton

What if the key to sustaining long term success is not grinding harder, but giving yourself permission to create like an artist?

In this episode, serial entrepreneur and community builder Will Melton breaks down what 21 years of business ownership actually looks like behind the scenes. We talk about shifting from proving people wrong to building real freedom, why viewing failed projects as mere attempts changes everything, and how to use AI to buy your time back rather than live in fear of change.

What we cover in this episode:

• Why building a business like an artist prevents chronic burnout

• The transition from proving energy to finding purpose 

• Reframing failure: why ideas do not fail, they just wait for the right timing

• Will's 4 part daily priority filter (and why Vision must stay at number one)

• How AI is actually bringing people together in community

Connect with Will:

Website: www.willmelton.com

AI Ready RVA: www.aireadyrva.com

Xponent21: https://xponent21.com/insights/team-member/will-melton/

Newsletter: Build With Brennan: Weekly insights on company culture, personal development, burnout prevention, and more.

My YouTube Channel: Video versions of the podcast

Business Website: Culture Consulting, Speaking, Burnout Prevention, and More

Other Social Links: LinkedIn, facebook, instagram

Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:03

Well thanks for joining me today. Thanks for having me. This is great. Absolutely. So your powerhouse in Richmond, Virginia, if people don't know who you are, you are a serial entrepreneur, you have so many things going on. And after reading your story and hearing about the book that you're launching, one of the first questions that came to mind to ask you was where does your drive to do so many things come from? Because I feel like people look at people like you and they see on the outside you're involved in so many different things. And I know the question you probably get often is how do you have the energy to sustain it? Or what motivates you? And so I'd love for you to enlighten us.

SPEAKER_01 0:44

Yeah, I'm gonna answer the question a little bit differently because I'll tell you from my perspective of what I think about, which is I think that people look at me and all the things that I do and say, well, there's no way he's successful at any of it because he's too scattered. Uh and and that'll, I'm sure, what make its way into the conversation later. But the reality is, is um, I have had an active brain since I was a young person. I have a very vivid imagination. Um, I can go all the way there, I can see it. And um, the biggest problem that I had when I was younger was uh lack of confidence to drive ideas forward, to ask other people for help, to um believe in myself enough to try. And then, you know, on top of it, it's a lot of work to organize all this, uh, all these thoughts, the organization required to build anything. Uh, and AI has been a really tremendous tool to help me organize my thoughts, to help me rapidly iterate around an idea that maybe I'll throw away in a day, but I at least got to scratch the itch. And and so I think the best way to describe it is um I woke up in 2023 one day and I stood up and I said, man, I've been trying to be a better business person for 23 years or 18 years. I should have been trying to be a better artist. And and so what I do is I allow myself to try things and to do things and not worry too much about whether or not I'm gonna succeed at it. And a lot of times I start stuff and I know that I don't have the energy to sustain it, but I'm doing it because I'm gonna learn something. And I'm grateful for that, no matter what anybody thinks of me.

SPEAKER_00 2:15

Yeah. Was there a time for you where that wasn't the case where maybe there's something inside of you that prevented you from trying new things and not detaching, I guess not attaching so much to the outcome?

SPEAKER_01 2:27

Um, well, I would say that there was a time that I didn't think that I had the resources to pursue the ideas that I had. Um and and when you're younger, you don't have a lot of financial resources. As you get older, you build them. Uh that's certainly been the case for me. Um, but I don't think it has as much to do with the financial resources because those are everywhere if you know where to look. And and not knowing where to look isn't a barrier either, because nowadays you have AI at least, you know. But but a question can be asked of anybody of like, how do you get how do you raise money for an idea that you have? I have been unwilling to go through any startup programs or you know, fundraising learnings because those are huge commitments and I have a business to run. So I've been you know self-employed for 21 years, and um, you know, that keeps me busy. So I I've had excuses to avoid kind of going down the formal startup route. But at the same time, as a marketer, as a communicator, as a brand builder, um, I have a lot of the skills that are required to start these things and to put them out there. And because I have a following, because I have a presence that that people pay attention to. Um, yeah, people see all of it. And I'm pretty open about that because I find that I actually wrote this down today. I said, you know, it's like being a plenary painter. You know, you could be a really terrible plenary painter, but you'd still have people standing behind you watching you paint that picture. And they might say, man, that guy sucks. But, you know, like they still stopped, they still watched, and and you're still painting. And there's nothing wrong with that, whether you're a good painter or a bad painter, you're creating without the fear of judgment. And that's the hardest thing. I think the biggest thing that people face when they think about doing anything is what are other people going to think? I still think about that. My ego still suffers whenever I think about what other people think of me. Um, and just the question, oh, well, you do so much. Um, it just automatically takes my my brain to the space of, well, people must assume that, you know, that I'm not successful at any of it. Now, I talk to a lot of people and they tell me that they know that I'm successful or they see that I'm successful. They actually don't know the truth. Nobody does. Um, but I'm still here, and so I must be doing something right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:35

I love that perspective because it's one thing to I see a lot of performativeness, especially in the entrepreneurial space. I see a lot of people who, and this is something I used to struggle with and sometimes still do. Feeling like that the version of you that isn't always on and isn't trying to prove themselves and isn't performing, that version is not good enough to be out in public. It's not good enough to be presented to the community. And I would love your perspective on where you think that comes from, and if that was ever the case for you. And if so, if that was the case, you kind of felt like you had to be somebody else or you wore a mask. How did you start getting through that? Maybe on an internal level, but then also just the actions that you started to take to break through that barrier.

SPEAKER_01 5:19

Yeah. Well, I can answer it two ways. One, I still have a side to me that I don't want people to see. Um, I, ever since I was a kid, my father did. I have, I wouldn't call it anger management issues, but I can be kind of reactive to stimulus. Now, um, I've I've worked for a long time to be able to put a filter on that and to be able to look in the mirror before I look on the factory floor to see whether or not my reaction is fair to others. Um, but but you know, I can I can fly off the handle pretty quickly, and I I don't want people to see that. Um and sometimes I may make make a mistake and I'm, you know, and I'm I'm in a confrontation with somebody in public, and I'm like, maybe that wasn't a good idea. Um that's the vulnerable answer. Uh I think the answer you're looking for is um there there was you know, there was a time that I felt like I was sure that other people thought that I was a try hard. You know, that was kind of that'd be the best way I could come up with it. It's like, you know, somebody who wants so badly to be successful that they're doing all this stuff and being in the spotlight to get other people to see that they're successful, but you know, that's not really the case. Now, I I have been very intentional from a young entrepreneur age to find a purpose in the room that I'm in. And I'm not having it's not a purpose for my life. It's uh why do I belong here? How can I contribute? And if I do this work, I will be recognized for it. I will be acknowledged as somebody who can be relied upon, which honestly, at the end of the day, you know, like for me, everything that matters to me is reputation. My reputation is my currency. And if people believe in me and they take me seriously, um, which is actually my shadow, now that I think about it and say it out loud. When I was a kid, I was a goofball. And I can still be a goofball as an adult, but I was a goofball so much that people thought, oh, that guy, you know, he's not gonna be anybody. But in my head, I was like, I'm gonna be, I didn't think I was gonna be president or anything like that, but like, I'm gonna be successful. You know, why didn't I get that superlative in the new in the yearbook that said, you know, most likely to succeed or something like that? And and so my head as a kid, I was like, well, I'm gonna prove them all wrong. I'm gonna prove them all wrong. And and you know, nowadays I don't care anymore. And I think that's a really important lesson is like I should have never cared what they thought to begin with, because that was that held me back for years. It stopped me from doing all kinds of things that I should have been able to do. And I know that now because I've been able to do a lot of things that I didn't think I could have done. And, you know, people like you ask if I can join their podcast, and and that that that's a signal that I did something right.

SPEAKER_00 7:56

I love that. There's so many layers to what you just said, and and the the first one I want to grab onto, because this is so common and and something I dealt with as well, is the fuel, the initial fuel that you use to be successful. And the story in your head was I need to prove these people wrong. And I see that that's a fuel that is really potent and really powerful, especially at first. And and you come from a really hard background. I guess that's objective, but you come from a background of nothing was given to you. You had to earn everything. And I come from a similar background too. And so that fuel is, I feel like, very powerful to get you out of survival. It's really great to get you, it helps you outwork the circumstances that are truly limiting you. Like when your environment and and the things that you can't control are limiting you, it's a great way to break through that barrier. But then I've also noticed it gets to a point where the same thing that helps you get out of survival is not the same thing that's gonna help keep you out of survival. And that can be the very thing that actually holds us back from expanding and growing more into the person that we came here to be, with lack of better terms. And it sounds like you you've maybe, and correct me if I'm wrong, it sounds like you've made the transition, maybe not completely, but you've started to make this transition from the fuels I need to prove myself to tapping into something greater than you. So I I would love to hear when that started to happen. Was there any cat catalytic event or was there any circumstances in your life that propelled you towards that? Or was it just one day you woke up and you're like, I'm gonna change the way that I drive myself, motivate myself? I'm just curious what that experience was like for you.

SPEAKER_01 9:30

Uh no, it was a years-long uh exercise. And so I think, you know, to answer maybe to respond to what you just said, the the biggest work is to recognize where you fall short. Um and it's like you can know where you're strong, you can know what you're good at, uh, but you have to be able to know where you are weak and where you can't meet the moment. And and and that's the key. And because for me, it's always been about overcoming those barriers and trying to figure out like, well, this is what I can't do. How do I do it? And I think if if there's one word that comes out of this interview that anybody should hear, it's the word how. Because if you face any obstacle in your life and your immediate reaction is to say, well, that's that's gonna be hard, or you know, any kind of thing other than, well, how would I do it? Then you've you've missed the opportunity to motivate yourself from the very outset, and it's an indicator of what your mindset is. But but I I did, you know, I had a coach for many years, and and I was super grateful for that experience. Um, I don't have a coach now, and and part of it's because I'm very busy and I'm doing a lot of things that are that are capitalizing off of that that coaching experience. Um but I went from from, you know, I had a business coach, and so it was all about success and financial success and how do I grow a business. And and I was constantly trying to figure out how to set and meet financial goals. And in the process of that experience, what I learned was I wasn't looking for a way to set and meet financial goals. I was looking for a pathway to freedom. Um, and and freedom for me is um, you know, not losing sleep every night trying to figure out how I'm gonna pay the bills. And that's the way I was when I was a kid, and that was what survival looks like. Um, significance or, you know, or you know, thriving success. It looks like you have the resources that you need today, maybe tomorrow, next week, a couple months down the road, a few months, a couple of years if you're really successful. Uh, but as long as you have the resources that you have today and you have the brain power and the time and the energy to pick up the phone, make a phone call to get you know some emails out, whatever you've got to do, uh, the the barriers are are achievable. You know, you could overcome those. You just have to know what they are. And and so I've been really fortunate to have been up against a wall many times in my life where it the the moment was either show up and do the work and get the thing solved, or fall on your face and let everybody see that and be the failure that you never said you'd let happen. And so, you know, it it still goes back to that shadow, that ego that says, well, you you need to prove to everybody that you're gonna be the success. Um, but at the same time, you know, I'm a marketer, I'm a communications person, and so people don't see all the failures. And it's not that I don't go out of my way to highlight them. Um, I go out of my way to highlight everything that I do. And some things just they fail quietly and people don't see it. But I've looked at that as a completely different scenario. It is not failure, it is it was an attempt. I tried something and I decided that I didn't have the energy, I didn't want to put my time in it. And that's a decision, that's not a failure.

SPEAKER_00 12:38

I love that reframe of an attempt versus a failure. Because I feel like a lot of words have so many definitions to like burnout, for example. When I talk about burnout, somebody's definition of burnout could be completely different than another person's, and it could like close people up or be defensive. And I feel, especially when it comes to going back to what you said about the fear of people's perception, a lot of times when people hear failure, what people talk about to rectify that the fear of failure is well, just see failure as a learning experience or see failure as this. But I I think it's really powerful when you change the word from failure to attempt. And uh that's just great. And again, there's so many layers from that too. I feel like I have so many questions for you because it it seems like you have a unique, it seems like you're holding both worlds at once right now. Like you're holding this world of the ego, which is correct me if I'm wrong, it sounds like you don't alienate or think it's negative to necessarily have that energy of wanting to prove yourself. But I also don't get the sense for you that that's your main drive. I also don't get the sense for you that that's like the main thing that's keeping you going. Because if it was, I feel like the obsession would be over the results, and less so about the purpose and impact. And just from the little research I've done and even just like the places I've seen you, I know that you're a very mission-driven person. So how do you balance those two worlds of results and outcomes and making sure you're driving the business forward, but then also emotional fulfillment, making sure what you're doing is an integrity of your value system and doing something for means that are greater than yourself.

unknown 14:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:14

I'm not gonna be able to remember all three of those things, but I'll give you my best answer and you can ask me again if I miss anything. Sure. Um number one, I would say that um I I still feel like reputation is my currency. You know, I'm able to operate because people trust me. And so I still have to go out into the world, say, I'm gonna go do this thing, and then go do it and either succeed or fail and and be okay with it. Um, I have to succeed more than I fail if I'm gonna maintain the trust of people in the community and I'm gonna continue to have that um quiver in in my hat, so to speak. So so that's not ego. That is an awareness of the way that social connections work to empower success. Um another thing I would say, you know, maybe in response to what you said before, not what you asked me, was, you know, it's okay, you know, like I don't have money all the time. Like, you know, I need I need to sell some things, I need to close some deals, I need to get some work, you know, booked to make it all work. And and you know, I've learned how to tell people that. I've learned to tell people, like, look, we've been talking about this deal. I need to close the deal. Can we figure out a way to make this happen, you know, this month? Like, and that that's the sort of thing that that I've I've transitioned from. It's like, well, you could be embarrassed and pretend like everything's fine and you've got all the money that you need to do your job. But even if I did, you know, it doesn't mean I don't still have goals. Everybody should have goals. And I can also tell my client that, look, I've got a goal this month that I want to hit. Do you do you want to do this deal? Can we make something happen? And so, you know, I don't always have the resources, but if I focus my energy on what I don't have, I'm not focused on what I need to do to fill the gap. And and I think a lot of people do that is they focus too much on what they don't have, or like today was a bad day. Like, oh, we've had, you know, sales have been down for a week. You know, if you have sales down for several months, you probably need to have a problem. But, you know, we have a tendency to focus on what's right in front of us. And a bad sales day or a bad sales week is gonna be something we focus on. But you forgot that record month that you had last month, you're not even able to see, you know, the the super duper double month that you're gonna have next year. You know, like those sort of uh perspectives are or this is the fallacy of the human mind. And you have to be, I have to be very aware. If I'm gonna be successful in any of this stuff, I have to be very aware of what that looks like, um, both from my perspective, but also what the reality is. And I think that the, you know, the answer is yes, I do hold both things, you know, really well in my mind. Um and and I think that the the biggest you know advice I could give anybody is the more vulnerable I am, the more I share about what I'm going through with people, you know, whether it's something I have an idea about that I want to build or whether I'm throwing something away that I decided that was a good idea before, but I just you know don't care about now. You know, um I think again, as long as I've got a few things going that that are really successful, that do pay the bills and that keep me in business, um, I'll continue to maintain the trust of the people and I won't worry too much about their judgments. If somehow I fall flat on my face and and it's not likely that's gonna happen, um I've always told myself, you know, if if it happens, you know what to do. Um and and it's you know, there will be a reputational hit that I'll have to suffer through, but I'll also leverage my knowledge of my ego to overcome it if it happens. I don't plan on it happening, but if it does, I'll build from scratch. And and and you know, at that point I won't be carrying around all of the burden of the baggage of all the things that I've built. Uh I've left businesses in the past um that didn't fail, but I started something new, I moved on. Um there's something really beautiful about being able to walk away from something. Um, to not have to answer all those emails that are coming in, to not have to think about the weight of carrying it. Um I don't feel that way. I'm incredibly enthusiastic about what I'm doing right now. Um but but it doesn't mean that I don't have struggles and it doesn't mean that I don't have uh problems that I need to solve in order to keep going.

SPEAKER_00 18:12

Absolutely. What are the factors that make it worth it to you? What are the factors, maybe internal, external? Like what are the factors that happen that make you decide I'm gonna stay and keep doing this thing or I'm gonna move on?

SPEAKER_01 18:26

So you asked me earlier a question that I think is a good a good way for me to answer this. I move past like trying to serve my personal goals or my personal ego when I realized that when you have an impact in the community, um you don't have to work as hard at convincing people to trust you. Um and and it, you know, going it still ties back to the you know my reputation as my currency. Um, but it but if if we take the example of um when I was in Williamsburg, I joined the Chamber of Commerce because I was a business person and business people joined the Chamber of Commerce. Like literally, that was what I knew. And and so when they came to sell me on joining, I was like, yeah, sure, you know, like that's that's what I'm supposed to do. And so I started going to these networking events, and I was like stand there. I didn't know anybody, I didn't want to be there. I I mean I wanted to be there, I wanted to leverage it, but I was like nervous and didn't. I mean, I'm I'm okay talking to people too. So that's not like a big problem. But these people seem to know each other, they're all having a good time and they're older. This is Williamsburg. I'm a 20-year-old kid, and I don't, you know, I don't know anything. So what I found was that I joined the ambassador committee. I don't somebody asked me, somebody called me from the ambassador committee and he said, Hey, do you want to join this after we talked for 30 minutes? And he thought I would be good at it. And I'm like, Yeah, that'd be great. I could talk to 15 new people a month and all this stuff. And I have a reason to do it. You know, they'll they'll welcome me into their office. And he told me that. He's like, Yeah, you just show up to their office and be like, Yeah, I'm from the chamber and like let's talk. And so, you know, that experience gave me a reason to be in the room and it gave me a purpose. I'd I'd I'd find ways to talk to people. Um, but I would also sit in the office at when I had free time. I'd drive around town, selling, talking to clients, whatever. And I'd just sit down in the chamber office and talk to them. Well, you'd be surprised how much those people know about what's happening in a community. And so I would get access to opportunities, people would tell me things. I'd be invited to volunteer on different committees, and that ended up being a big lesson because it connected me to a ton of people and it allowed me to demonstrate that I'm willing to give before I ever ask. And and and I think that that, you know, as a habit, is something I've done a lot of is I I I will wait as long as humanly possible to ask anybody for anything. And if I don't ever have to ask you for anything, I won't ask you for anything. I'll give you everything I can give you, and and I'll never ask you for a thing, unless I feel like you know, I've bought you lunch too many times and you you owe me one. But but generally speaking, you know, I'm I'm gonna give until I'm like, oh wait, I need something from you and I have a good reason to ask for it. Um, my sales brain is it goes into action and it's just like it knows how to ask for it. And so, but but by then it's really hard for people to say no because I've built the reputation, I've built the trust, and and really by that point, like I know what I'm asking them for is something that they're likely to support, or that I already know what they're gonna get out of it, and I don't have to work that hard to convince them of it. And and so it may sound like my whole job is sales, but I kind of feel like that's my whole job. And even if I'm not selling somebody uh something that they're buying, I have to sell people ideas all the time. I have to get people convinced and excited and onboarded with the thing I need to get done because I can't do it on my own. And and so I I am in sales all the time. And uh yeah, I don't know if that answers the question, but I but I that's I hope it gets close.

SPEAKER_00 21:49

Yeah, yeah, I touched on it. And and because the original question was like, what is the deciding factor for you when it comes to staying starting going? Yeah. And it sounds like what I heard and then you can you can fill in the blanks too. What I heard is for you, um when you feel like you've maybe when you still feel like you're learning something new from the environment that you're in and it's it's giving you the opportunity to have more opportunities and and ways to connect and impact people, then typically you're you're staying. But when you feel like maybe you've hit a cap when it comes to how much it's going to help you grow and also the reach that it's going to give you, then typically that's when it sounds like you want to break out and do something different. Is that correct? And is there anything I'm missing?

SPEAKER_01 22:31

Yeah there's two pieces to it one is is that like I I leverage feedback heavily. So if I put something out there and it might be the algorithm and I'm totally wrong. I need to push it more but if I put something out there and it doesn't get a lot of traction then I might not be as excited to pursue it. You know, but if I put something out there and people like oh yeah that's that's so cool. You know if one person tells me that's maybe okay but I need a few people to tell me like I should keep going. So I I leverage feedback a lot and it'd be you'd be amazed at how many people see what you post online that they don't comment, that don't share, that don't like and but they'll tell you in person oh I saw your video a lot more people are paying attention than you think. And so so be out there as much as you can but um but that's one piece. And the other piece is uh whether I like doing it or not. You know sometimes I start things and I'm like wait this is going to be a lot of work. I started channel RVA this year in in April and every single day I wake up at 5 30 so I can go to the gym at six. And in that time I get up I put my gym clothes on I take the dogs out I drink a Celsius I get my water ready and I'm curating news stories to put in the daily digest that goes out every single day at 6 a.m and and I and it's a perfect time for me to do it and I've built the application that allows me to do it in that time frame at quality and speed and scale. That is uh that's a commitment that I wasn't I didn't know I was signing up for when I started the whole thing but I made the decision. I've loved it I've absolutely loved it because now I have um I have built-in subscribers you know who are paying attention to what I'm doing every single day and I don't make it about me. I mean I have a few things that I do as a part of channel RVA that I like people to know about and and get them involved with um but but it's about well first of all knowing that I'm a personality people care about that's a nice thing for my ego. And and it's also like well you know I have people tell me like they expect to see that newsletter every single day. And so I'm delivering a service to people even it doesn't cost anything for them there's a responsibility to that that I that keeps me with it. And so I'm still that's maybe a blend of you know like the social feedback plus am I going to like doing it? And I think I like doing that because I I'm able to have an impact. I'm able to have that social feedback on a regular basis that gives me the the fuel to keep going. But but sometimes I get into things and I'm like you know this is really hard or I just don't have it in me to do this. I need to find help someplace else I need to involve other people and and so a lot of times I very seldom ever do anything where I I know when I start it that I'm gonna not keep going. I did one build this year on Valentine's Day that I knew that I wasn't going to keep going after I built it it was like one of those like I need to come up with an idea for today I need to come up with an idea for today to build for my sessions. And then it was a fun little thing it was a Valentine's Day egg is what I called it and it was I won't get into the details but but it was one of those throwaways as well very few that are like that. Most of them I start I put them out there I see what people think they might serve some utility for me or my company and have real value in that regard but it's not necessarily a successful product. But I don't it's not in sunset in my mind. I'm like it's still valuable it still has of you know it creates a solution to somebody's problem so with enough love and energy and communications and we can get it out there. So those are backburner for me and that's the way that I think about it. I don't really quit anything I don't fail at much time limited things you fail at but you know ideas you don't fail at ideas you just refine them over time and wait for the right moment to really pull the trigger and execute um and so I've had the opportunity I've had a lot of ideas over the course of my life that just kind of sat there or I wrote them down and was like you know how am I going to do that? Like that's that's that's grand, you know um but you know in the in the pursuit of my own learning I've gone as far as this weekend I built something called Dreamscape which helps people envision the successful future that uh they want for themselves. And it's not about how much money you have or any of that but it's like how do you feel what the thing smell like what does it taste like what you know um all the the senses so that you can you can trick your mind into believing it and and that is I think the biggest barrier that most people face is the belief system that's required to get to where you want to go. And so I've just um that's something I'm super excited about. Honestly if after 44 app builds this year, that one is the thing that I think is maybe the most valuable thing because it's going to have the most impact for people who use it. I listen back to my my dreamscape narrative every day and I've only done this for three days now since it's been done. But I like I want to listen to it multiple times but it's not a good use of time. I have space to create different dreamscapes for different areas of my life and I will then go in and do that and then I'll be able to listen back to a few of them and and kind of appreciate that time spend but no I I think that failure is an idea is way too ingrained in our society. And it's probably not just America it's probably humanity and it I think it's it ties back to the ego. It ties back to our our our necessity to to to kind of project what other people think about us. It's we are really our worst enemies sometimes I agree.

SPEAKER_00 28:02

Yeah and it's thanks for bringing that down it's interesting how your two elements are is this helping me grow and is this like logically structurally helping me get to where I want to go and then also do I enjoy it which the the people that I help most often and work with it's they're so good at the logic, the rationale the is this going to produce results that they're typically really struggle with the fulfillment piece, the emotional fulfillment which is the fuel from my perspective of that's the only thing that's gonna actually carry you even you you know we all are going to do things even the thing that we love we sometimes hate to do sometimes but from a fundamental level if the ratio stuff that in our life that we're doing typically energizes us more than it trains us, we're gonna be able to keep doing it and that's the when we're able to look past just the thing that we're doing but also evaluate the energy behind it. I feel like that's the game changer because now you're not just looking at what's logical and the shoulds and what's expected but you're also looking at does this nourish my soul in the way that tells me that I'm doing the thing that I'm meant to do. And that's nothing that can you can't replicate that. You can try like I got addicted to stimulus to try to you can you can squeeze it out of you but deep down you're always gonna know man this doesn't really it doesn't light me up the way that I know something else that's more meant for me should. And so that's a really cool perspective and maybe a good question I have for you is when it comes to that this it sounds like you've had a lot of different shifts of identity in your life as opposed like and you've had a lot of different exposures to different environments and places and things what do you feel coming from survival mode and coming from a poor household and just coming from that upbringing what has been the biggest challenge for you in regards to just your relationship with money and your relationship with balancing the results but also doing things because they bring you joy and the emotional fulfillment piece because I feel that that's something I'm still going through and so many people are struggling with finding the balance between it. So I'd just love to hear your perspective on that.

SPEAKER_01 30:17

Yeah I I think that I'm probably a very unique case and and I'm I'm probably not an example of what people should do. Okay. But over the course of my 21 years of entrepreneurship I have been in a tight spot many times and um and I've worked my way out of it every single time and and I think that that has taught me a lesson that I'm really good at anything that I try to do um with enough dedication and time. But but I'm also like very interest driven. And so I oscillate between doing a lot of things that are very interest driven and like needing to like oh wait like I got to pay attention to the business things that make money and pay the bills and stuff. Now part of what happens when I take that mentality I have a team of about 15 people so you know it's not just me over here. But what happens is my team recognizes when I'm checked out on something and that they need to kind of step in and say like Will like what are you doing? Like you you're not holding this and I had a leadership meeting today and they're like you know I'm I'm flagging the risk here that you know you're gonna be doing more sales and and client strategy work but you also you know have to do this leadership role and the the client services team and you know that it's probably not going to work out really really sustainably and I'm like okay I hear you I recognize that we need to do something about it but but it's um it's uh what ends up happening is the necessity. I always talk about the necessity uh I don't have a really word for it but like necessity drives you um and so like if you if you want to get like go out and be an entrepreneur and you get a full-time job that pays your bills there's a good chance you're not ever going to start the thing because the the job that pays your bills is like your rock it's like stable it's keeping you keeping you going and and the the grind of extra hours at the end of the day when you're already maybe burnt out at your regular job is just not something that most people can sustain. And so when I think about like burnout for instance like I haven't felt burnout in a really long time I've recognized after taking a vacation that I'm like oh wait I should have done that a few months ago right but but I don't get burnt out because I don't force myself to do a bunch of stuff that I don't like to do. Um I I either I just avoid it enough to where my team picks it up and and that's not a really great leadership quality but it you know depends on how you look at it. Go on. Yeah yeah yeah I mean but I but it they know me well enough they know that I am who I am and I'm gonna present as this way and and it can be a bit of a joke in our our videos that we produce about it but it's it's um it's the symbiotic thing we we figure out a way to make it work and and the reality is is if I don't find myself in a place of necessity um I don't work well and and so one of the things that happens when I have a lot of money which occasionally happens not very often but when I have a lot of money like I want a lot of jobs you know just have an influx of cash I try to get rid of as much of it as possible because if I have a lot of money I'm comfortable and if I'm comfortable I might be like oh maybe I don't need to sell that much this month. Yeah and and so so the oscillation between doing what I really want to do and like trying to solve these problems that emerge when I'm ignoring things tends to work for me somehow. And I think it works because I'm not spending all my time doing things that I don't want to do. I'm I'm I'm giving myself I'm forcing myself to do things I'm managing my time in a way that I'm doing the things I really enjoy at the expense of the things that I need to do with a hope that the organization that I've built picks up some of the slack and that we build systems to solve those problems when we we get there. And we do we build a lot of tools we build a lot of systems and that's been a you know talk about AI it's been a huge game changer for us from a technology perspective but also just a thinking partner perspective. And I feel like Superman to be honest with you. It's it's weird uh I don't I don't I'm not super capable I just know how to use the tools.

SPEAKER_00 34:09

Yeah that's so powerful and and I think you're touching on it we can get into AI a little bit because I think you're definitely the expert you're way more way more than me and I I've always thought about AI as the thing that allows humans to do more of what they enjoy. Like when it comes to what I what I believe would be I guess the ethical main purpose of AI is to help people enjoy their lives better. And I just would love to hear your perspective on that and what are the because there's it seems to me there's two sides to this. One is the people who fear it and the people who are not embracing it and and they're scared it's they're thinking about it from a scarcity perspective of it's gonna take my job, it's gonna take my income it's it's not good because it's removing connection. So that's this side over here. And then there's a side over here that sees the opportunity in it and says oh wow it's actually going to allow me to do more of the stuff I'd love to do. It's gonna give people more opportunities it's actually going to connect us more and and amplify our humanness and so one would love to hear your which side you tend to be on and then also overall what you feel the purpose of AI is, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 35:19

I mean Yeah yeah well the first thing I'll do is I'll take AI out of the equation. If you if you change the word AI to change, you'd find that the same people respond to the to the survey the same way. The people who are fearful will be fearful of change whether it's AI or some analog thing and the people who are excited will be excited. And and I think that there's a fundamental wiring that we all carry around and we're either generally fearful of change or we're generally appreciative of it. When I was a kid I was bored uh if nothing changed. And so you know my dad was in and out of the hospital and my mom was working three jobs. We get home at the end of the day of school and I didn't want to do my homework um and I was bored. And so I get to work rearranging the living room. I probably rearrange the living room multiple times a year uh throughout my childhood because I wanted a fresh perspective. I wanted a different vibe. And and that's kind of a line on my creativity. But uh generally speaking I love change. I I thrive in a changing environment because I get bored if things don't change. I don't sit still very well you know um but but for the people who who fear change and the people who are observing AI as a threat to their existence um I cannot fault them. I I would like to move them beyond that fear. I'd like to assure them that um this changes like all the others that have happened it might be happening a little bit faster. But but there is an opportunity in all of this and if we spend all of our time worrying about what the future is going to look like we will spend no time uh wielding the the power that we have to to shape it. And so what I believe the purpose of AI is or I don't know that it's so much the purpose because it's been a long time coming, but the the the utility of AI is that we get our time back. And we can choose to fill it with doom scrolling on social media and um you know getting another job or you know maximizing output and all that stuff but that race is not sustainable. We we cannot compete each other. We need to learn how to collaborate. And so the silver lining on the fear of AI is that it is the existential threat. It is the apex predator that we've never had. And so it's like the 9-11 it brings us together a little bit more. And I'm seeing it happen. I'm seeing community form people who don't know what to do the natural instinct in and human psychology is to seek out information from your peers. What are they doing? How do I replicate that? How do I you know do this social thing and we're back to the ego and perceptions of others you know and all this stuff but you know at the end of the day um we have a lot of problems man we have a lot of things that we need to solve uh and and if we don't leverage these tools in our free time that we got back from the productivity gains that it gave us to try to focus on that and to collaborate with other people and to try to imagine a world where we can solve the problems, uh we blew it. And so I really think that um I've seen community form around AI. I've seen people be enthusiastic about AI's potential to help us solve some of the world's biggest problems. And so I think that that's where we're at. I think we're we're we're beyond the point of of endless competition um and and you know ire and negativity and and fighting and I I think not because AI is the apex predator it's not it is a creation that we made and it is an extension of us and it's only empowered when we give it the power um yes there are bad actors that will empower AI to do some bad stuff um but but that's even more reason for us to be thinking about how we can leverage that technology to do good things before that can be a real problem for us. So um time back more time in community more time talking to customers more time you know collaborating with others on solving problems it's a reality that's unfolding before us and I I will talk about it endlessly so that others see it, believe it and participate in it.

SPEAKER_00 39:13

I love that yeah and it's something that came up for me as you were talking about that was one of the things that I've dealt with and I guess what's helped with my transition out of survival mode is a lot of times um what I found is whenever I had created more space in my life, it's kind of like what you said about money. Like when I had when I have a more abundance of time or open space in my schedule and more peace, which I'm actually experiencing now being a business owner which is very counterproductive to what you're taught about being a business owner I find myself sometimes feeling nervous or anxious or this impulse to try to fill up that time with some things that are productive because I'm very aware of how limited our time is. And I think there's times where it's fear based, where it's like I don't care what it is, I'm just gonna make my calendar busy and that's the trap of mistaking motion for progress. And then I also find a lot of times it's inspired it's it's purposeful based. And I'm just curious because it seems like you've created a life for yourself that you're doing the majority of things that you enjoy for somebody who's out here listening to this and one who wants to leverage AI to enjoy more of their life and and take away the things that they don't like doing what are some practical steps that they can start taking to leverage the tool to create more fulfillment in their life in general I know that's a broad framing but just would love to hear your perspective.

SPEAKER_01 40:38

I think I I would say that maybe the answer isn't to to use AI to think about how to use AI to do that, but it's to think about how to use AI and any element of your life where you want to succeed. And so the better way that I would answer it is you know say you're you you know you want to break through or whatever you know AI isn't going to give you the answer. You know you you've got to search inside you have to kind of understand yourself a little bit better. And and so one of the exercises that I I developed in my coaching uh experience and that I continue on with today is a thing I call the daily um daily reflection. And it's I don't do it every day I might not even do it every month sometimes it's but it's something that I can come back to when I feel like I need a moment to ground myself and to figure out where I'm at in my life and where I need to go. But the very first thing that I do before I ask myself or answer any questions is I write down my priorities in order based on today because every day is different. You know um you know my priorities are not the same day to day but priority if you but most people don't know this but priorities like the the plural of priorities is is false. The priority is one there's only one thing in the priority um and if you if you falsify that and you try to pretend like you've got 10 things that you need to do, you're not going to get the priority done. And so the first step in my exercise is to list the four things that are my priorities and what is in number one position. Because whatever's the number one position is where I focus my energy my time. So I'll tell you what the four things are for me. They've been the same since I started this it is vision, sales, team development and recruiting. Now in the beginning when I first started this sales was always at the top of the list. And the longer I went through the exercise and the more I realized that sales was at the top of the list I knew that that meant that vision wasn't at the top of the list and that it meant that I wasn't prioritizing finding the talent that was needed to do the necessary work of sales so that I can unburden myself and focus on the vision. I am the visionary. That's what I'm good at that's what I should be doing if I'm doing my job. Now for a long time I used to think that that was lazy. I used to think that thinking and talking and writing and not getting anything done was not productive. But as I've done this exercise and I've thought about where my head's at and what I need to be doing, the prioritization is a great exercise because sometimes sales does make it way in the number one position. If sales in the number one position I've done something wrong. I've not done a good job as a leader. I've not I've missed something along the way um but it happens um but it's a grounding exercise and and but what I will say is that by allowing vision to be in the number one position it should always be and and for the most part it does stay there. I give myself grace I I allow myself to go for a walk and to think and to talk to Claude or to write my notebook for an hour in the morning or to to just write that burning piece of content that is you know eating me up inside that if I don't get it out then I'm not going to be successful. I know that that is sometimes it means I'm not sending that email that's going to get me that $70,000 job or you know whatever pays the bills, but I do what my heart tells me to do and and and I'm also like very driven by deadlines and necessity and stuff. So like if if like push comes to shove, I'll drop the stuff that is fun to do what is needed so that I can get back on track. And so I think that part of the reason I don't get burnt out is because I don't devote all my time to stuff I don't like doing. I I really like create a lot of space to do the stuff I love and then uh I have to buck up and do some hard stuff here and there to be able to make ends meet.

SPEAKER_00 44:24

Wow well I really enjoy this man I uh that that alone was very powerful so I really you know hope for the people listening to this you you take that and you apply it and that's something I actually want to start implementing for my life. My question for you is how can we support you?

SPEAKER_01 44:38

What are some things that you're involved in right now what's the call to action that you want everybody listening to to go do man that's a tough one uh because as you said I have a lot going on um what's your number one priority? Well since we did talk about AI ready RVA um I think the best way to empower people is to give them hope that there's a pathway. If you're afraid about uh change, if you're afraid about technology, afraid about the pace of change, um the best thing to do is to ground yourself in community and AI Ready RVA was built to do that. We do uh a bunch of in-person events, I mean probably a hundred a year, and we're always working to connect people that have similar interests to each other. AIREadyRVA.com is where they can go to learn about that. And then you know my world is is consumed by artificial intelligence whether it's building technology for for companies or or helping folks show up at the top of AI or just building for fun for myself. So if anybody wants to learn more about that there's a few different places to go to learn about me but willmelton.com is a pretty good place to to anchor on my speaking and uh that links out to a few other places where I'm I'm involved. So you know I think how can anybody help me um I don't know if you believe in what I'm doing if you believe in in what I could do uh just don't hesitate to reach out to me because um it it it might be an opportunity that we can work on uh maybe it's not but but if we don't have the conversation then then we won't know. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 46:06

Agreed. Well thanks both so much and I'll make sure the links are there and this has been awesome. I really enjoyed this.

SPEAKER_01 46:12

Thanks Bernard appreciate it